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 Ten Reasons why Professor Oak is Crazy

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Boxhead
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PostSubject: Ten Reasons why Professor Oak is Crazy   Wed Feb 22, 2012 12:33 am

Here is Professor Oak:



Harmless enough, right?

WRONG

This guy is crazy. I mean REALLY crazy. Here's some reasons why:

10. Doesn't know who you are.
You've lived next to this old fart for 10 years, yet he doesn't even know your gender, let alone name. Is Pokemon THAT thrilling that you ignore your next door neighbor?

9. Telepathically Stops You From Biking Inside
Every time you wanna pull out the old Mongoose, he magically stops you. How? In the glitch battle, he doesn't have any Psychic Pokemon. I smell black magic.

8. Stops you from going into the grass
This may not seem bad, but look: In Yellow, he caught a Pikachu there. It's not even found on that route! Imagine how kick ass it would have been in R/B to start with a Pikachu. You could just choose Charmander and easily 1-shot Blue's Squirtle. But no...

7. Trains behind your back
In the glitch battle, he has the Pokemon that neither you or Blue chose. He levels it up to 69. SIXTY-FREAKING-NINE. He says that he's too old for training, and yet, he trains behind your back and becomes stronger than Blue! Talk about an A-Class Liar...

6. Allows Blue to Randomly Fight You.
You have no experience battling, and the old fart stands aside while you and his grandson fight each other with ultra-rare Pokemon that could easily maim a person. Negligence? I think so.

5. Doesn't Allow Rapid Movement of Legs
This is a FR/LG related rant, but it still counts. He sends an Aide to give you running shoes after you beat Brock. He doesn't give it to you when you're running through a treacherous forest or through untamed lands. Nope. He gives it to you AFTER you beat a boss.

4. Encourages Gambling Through Animal Fighting
After you win a battle with Blue, he tells you to take his Grandson's money. Now this may not seem bad, but compare it to real life: you beat up a guy and rob them of half their entire life savings.

3. The Blank Pokedex
He researched Pokemon throughout his whole life, yet he gives you a BLANK pokedex. No comment there...

2. Negligence to his Grandson.
This is like the only family member that helps him with Pokemon, and yet he doesn't even know his name?! Geezus Christ with a side of Toast! This guy is insane

1. SENDING A TEN YEAR OLD BOY OUT IN THE WILD TO DEFEND FOR HIMSELF
What guy does this?! The Poke-Police should be on his ass ASAP. This is a federal crime! Red even gets involved with Gangs! Gangs for god's sake! Although they're stupid gangs, they're still freaking gangs!

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PostSubject: Re: Ten Reasons why Professor Oak is Crazy   Wed Feb 22, 2012 12:08 pm

Maybe he has old timer's...

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PostSubject: Re: Ten Reasons why Professor Oak is Crazy   Wed Feb 22, 2012 6:08 pm

I've studied pokemon for all my life. Here, take this pokedex...it's empty....
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